How to Make a Mystery Machine Cake

There’s really not much to it.

You will need:

• 1 box cake mix (and supplies to make it)
• some cardboard or a small box
• waxed paper
• 2 cans of white frosting
• food coloring
• premade tube of orange frosting
• frosting bags and tips
• 5 Oreos
• toothpicks

First, split your cake batter between two loaf pans and bake until done. I used my small one (8.5 x 4.5 inches) because a smaller area gives you more height. For the other I had to use a regular loaf pan – more like 5 inches? It doesn’t matter too much, these are not technical specifications. Once they’re done, turn them out to cool.

I wanted to raise my cake off of the tray slightly, to leave room for the wheels. I wrapped a box of Rice-a-Roni in waxed paper, but that turned out to be a little thick; I’d have been better off wrapping a few layers of cardboard to raise the cake about half an inch.

Next, stick your cake pieces together. I put the flat sides to the outside (top and bottom) and stuck the uneven top sides together, without leveling. I’m a heretic, I know.

This involved a lot of frosting. (If you’re using premade frosting, as I was – I know! Heretic! – giving it time to sit out helps it dry and solidify to hold a little better.)

Then I coated the whole shebang with some groovy blue-green frosting. (To get that ‘vintage’ turquoise shade, color it a medium blue and add some green. I colored an entire tub and had leftovers, but your mileage may vary.) As you can see, it’s starting to look a little van-like now. I told Greg this was what the Mystery Machine looks like after forty years. Paint job faded, up on blocks…sad.

With white from the second tub, add windows, headlights, bumpers, and the luggage rack on the top.

Next, color the second tub a lime green by adding a little yellow to your green. Your ‘spare tire’ Oreo will NOT stay on with frosting alone; this is an easy fix, however. Take a toothpick and drive it halfway through the cookie (so the tip is in the filling and not sticking out the front) and then poke it into your cake like a thumbtack. A delicious, unhealthy thumbtack. Cover it in green, and pipe green in appropriate designs around the sides of your Mystery Machine.

Using the same technique, attach the tires. With your little orange tube, add flowers to the tires and the van, and either write the appropriate number (if you run out of time and energy, like I did), or go for the gold and write “The Mystery Machine” on both sides of your sugary van.

There! You did it! You made an amazing custom cake without special pans or equipment, with only rudimentary baking and decorating required.

I felt a little guilty using mixes and premade frosting, but you know what? I’m physically and emotionally exhausted right now. Now that we’ve passed Charlie’s birthday, the next thing on our List is “Pack Up and Move Out,” and I am so not ready.

Super Simple S’mores Brownies

Let’s just pretend these are made of yarn, shall we?

You know, I really love layered desserts. The different textures, colors, and flavors provide interest and appeal to all the senses and they just feel a little more special. Unfortunately, this is because ultimately they are almost always more labor-intensive than a simple bar cookie, for instance, and usually I am not in the mood to separately mix two or three different layers and carefully combine them before turning around to perform triple the cleanup.

So, when I ran across the idea of making s’mores inside of a brownie, I was intrigued. I love s’mores. I love brownies. S’mores brownies seemed like a natural pairing, destined for good things.

So let’s give it a shot, shall we? You’ll need your usual brownie recipe (or a mix prepared according to package directions). I like this one. I never use any other, and since I found it I stopped buying mixes. Homemade brownies sometimes tend towards the pale and bland, but this recipe is rich and chocolaty despite being flavored with cocoa (which I always have on hand) instead of with chocolate (which I rarely do). I have literally never had these brownies fail to turn out, and I’ve tested the recipe a lot. Whatever you like, make sure it’s a recipe intended to fill an 8×8 (or 9×9) pan – the size my mother refers to simply as “a brownie pan.”

Now that our batter is ready, let’s meet our special guests.

You will need graham crackers, marshmallows (mini or regular) and some sort of chocolate. You can use bars, chips, chunks – whatever you like. I’m using Hershey’s Special Dark chocolate chips…because it’s special, that’s why.

Now, I used a silicon baking pan, because marshmallows become exceedingly sticky when heated and cooled. If you don’t have one, you might like to line your pan with foil. Or butter it. You’re the boss.

Once your pan is sprayed or lined or buttered or what have you, put about half of your brownie batter in. Really you want only as much as it takes to nicely coat the bottom, because you could use a little extra batter at the end.

Next, take your graham crackers and cover the batter in a nice neat layer. Four and a half covered my pan perfectly.

Next comes the chocolate layer. You can make this as thin or as thick as you like, but come on. Let’s not be stingy.

After the chocolate you need a layer of marshmallows. Again, this can be as thin or as thick as you like. I only had a small bag of full-sized marshmallows, so I tore them all in half  before layering them on.

Finally, spread the remaining brownie batter over the marshmallows without disarranging the lower layers. Good luck with that.

It’s going to take longer than normal for your brownies to bake, on account of all the extra stuff we crammed into them. I usually bake mine (minus s’mores) about 17 minutes; I had to bake them about 10 extra minutes until a toothpick came out mostly clean. There’s melted chocolate in there, after all.

And the result?

Yum. Have your milk glasses ready!

Mmmm, Breakfast.

You know what I like?

Pancakes. What’s that stuff on them, you may ask? Well, I’ll tell you.

Many years ago my uncle and aunt lived in Hawaii.  From time to time they would send us exotic presents – guava jelly, a sugar cane, cowrie shell necklaces, that sort of thing. Occasionally they would send us a jar of coconut pancake syrup, which would be carefully doled out until it was gone because let’s face it, that little jar doesn’t last that long and you don’t get a bottle of syrup from Hawaii that often. In fact, I can’t remember the last time we had any!

A few weeks ago I was looking at a recipe for homemade syrup flavored with maple extract, and I thought, “I don’t have any maple, I wonder how coconut would taste?” Suddenly I flashed back to those bottles of Hawaiian coconut syrup,  and I knew I had to try and find a recipe.

I did.

Coconut Pancake Syrup

• 1 (14 oz) can coconut milk
• 1 c. flaked coconut
• 3/4 c. granulated sugar

Put the coconut in a food processor and shred until it is as fine as possible. Then mix all three ingredients in a saucepan and bring to a boil, stirring frequently. Reduce heat and simmer for 20 minutes, stirring occasionally. Makes about 2 cups of syrup. Eat and enjoy, because it’s awesome.

We put ours on top of some banana pancakes and they were divine. Divine.